August 3, 2016

Match Series: Johnny Bravo #onlinedatingadventures

ICYMI, I joined the bandwagon and signed up for My Mr. Right is taking his sweet time so I thought I'd help him out and meet him halfway, given he's on the same site and if he's not then I'll consider this practice or something. 

This new blog series details the highlights of my misadventures and to protect the not-so-innocents, I will not be sharing photos, names, screenshots, and what-not. I don't want to be hunted down! 

Code Name: Johnny Bravo
Age: 35yo
Hotness Factor: 4 Cauldrons

Johnny Bravo is one of the first people I "met" and eventually conversed with via phone when I first started on Match. He's funny, flirty, cute, and attentive. We have enough things in common so our conversations flow and did I mention he's cute? Yeah, Superman is smooth with a hot body to boot! I'd get sweet good morning videos from him and the silliness would continue on throughout the day.

Until I realized that this dude is so full of himself! 

He keeps sending me these vanity shots and videos not to keep me intrigued, but to fan his oh so fragile ego! Not only that, he would make baiting comments that sound self-deprecating at first but really he's fishing for compliments:

JB: I'm so poor and ugly, do you want to buy my Benz? I'll sell it to you real cheap.
Me: Ummm... no, you're not ugly, and no, I don't want your car, but thanks?

And perhaps the most annoying is how he keeps projecting and doesn't even realize it! I'm quite surprised because this dude sounded like a well-rounded individual and super confident only to realize that his strength is his greatest weakness. He's only as good as his looks but there's not much substance underneath the lean body and pretty smile. His EQ is that of a 15yo kid! What a fucking waste of good looks!!!

I eventually stopped talking to him, I told him that I'm not his type and it took some time convincing him until he finally got it. I know, I should've told him HE'S not my type but I didn't want to hurt his fragile feelings so I let him have the satisfaction of thinking that it's me and not him, I don't think I would be able to handle a grown man throwing a tantrum because their ego's been bruised.

Verdict: Definite No.
Lesson Learned: Vanity is NOT my favorite sin.

Talk Supe


  1. Fun! It's interesting to me to see how online dating goes for people. My friends keep trying to get me to try out, but I don't know. But anyway, this one sounds like a definite NO.


  2. Oh yes, throw him back sister! I know some guys like that. Luckily for me I'm not single and naive, so that spiel doesn't work on me. I tell them very politely that I'm not interested. He's out there Braine! I just know he is.

  3. gah you brave, brave girl. What happened to our Amazon society where we rule, we just keep them on chains until we need a spider killed, the trash taken out or something else only they can do ;-)
    Thanks for sharing

  4. Keep these coming :D
    I just watched this British show, and omg he sounds just like the guy dating there, lol

  5. I love the nickname you gave him and oh my gosh, I knew a couple of guys like this..still do in fact and yes, they are still single. :P
    As much fun as that was to read, I'm sure it wasn't for you at the time but hey, it's a learning experience right? I really hope you find your Mister Right soon.

  6. At least you got a few funny videos out of it.

  7. I am glad you are learning and growing through this. I admire your courage, and I hope that you do find him.

  8. Glad you and he moved on. I had one like that a few before my man, I figured out if they won't stfu when you're trying to let them go just say I love you as a friend. If the friend bit doesn't freak them out, the love bit will :D

  9. Sounds like it is a good thing you guys went your separate ways. I don't envy you. I hate dating. I had a mutual friend set up me and DH in college. We've been together ever since. While DH and I don't have a perfect relationship, I do appreciate that our relationship is better than many. We've been together over 29 years I'll take it. Good luck on yur next adventure.

    Melanie @ Hot Listens & Rabid Reads

  10. I love this feature- thank you for sharing your adventures! I hope your next one turns out better and that you get your HEA- you deserve it!

  11. Ergs on to the next! lol My uncle met his current wife via eHarmony. It so worked for them. Here's hoping!

  12. LMAO! O lordy, I love this feature! I hope you get a HEA, but please keep sharing you're adventures until then. :D

  13. Awww, girl!! Darn!! I mean, he did get 4 couldrons at first!! It's funny because I thought you were married, stay home wife or something, like a lot of bloggers!!

  14. Hahahaha! I so thought he was a good guy from your initial description, but lol. Seriously though, why do so many of the good looking guys so vain and self-deprecating? Good thing you realized he was a time-waste in your life pretty quickly!

  15. WOW. Does't that suck when you think you "know" someone? EEK. Hopefully, you have better luck!

  16. OMG I tried match at the beginning of the year and had some fun misadventures--never met a guy in person they all pretty much lost me in email/text. That being said, it was pretty funny at times! Good Luck!

  17. This sounds like the start of a book, lol. Too bad this was a definitely no, but better you find that out now than later along the road. Let's hope the next one is better!

  18. lol. Oh now! I'm sorry, I laughed, but it was the way you told us about him. I love the cartoon of Johnny Bravo there. ;D Sounds like an interesting turn to that one. On to the next! :D

  19. lols, omg..I got nothing. Wait, yes I do. You are a brave woman 😎

  20. lols, omg..I got nothing. Wait, yes I do. You are a brave woman 😎


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